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Mary Oliver - The Gift

 

The Way It Is

My hearing continues to fade. But with help from my ear trumpet I could juuuusssttt make out the cicadas last night. They like the warm nights.

The Mkt is down and took me with it this time. I'll have to wait it out.

I bought at 91.57. I'm currently down $72.96. Fortunately, I limit my betting involvement to $1,500.00. I was making $1,000.00 a week there for the last few months. Despite Trump.

I bought the lounge chair and will try it out today. I can sit for a brief spell as respite from standing -- the left hip won't tolerate weight for more than a few minutes at a time. But it's only when lying down that I'm really free of pain. The lounge chair showed up on Craigslist as if on cue.

Wearing my diaper I can ignore the urinary urgency and just pee in my pants. They'll soak up about 4 or 5 pees then gotta change 'em out. It's alot easier than carrying around a pee bottle or trying to make it to the bathroom. If I happen to be standing I pee in the yard.

Yesterday was the day after the trip to the store and those days are always a write-off. I was able to get up to goto the bathroom but went no further. It's as much a lack of energy as the hip having had to go beyond the normal call of duty.

Debbie the hospice nurse came by. She encouraged me to take more lorazapam instead of isosorbide. By doubling the loraz I was able to go 12 hours between doses of isosorbide instead of the usual 4 or 5. Her point was the angina is due more to anxiety than lack of oxygen. Next I'll try increasing the lorazapam and "meditating." That gets the heart going and often needs the isosorbide...or so I've thought.

Today my ears are clogged.. again. I use hydrogen peroxide to clean them out. I now have an alcohol soaking bowl for the ear twigs. 

Basking in alcohol

I unscrew them off the hearing aid & toss 'em in. It seems to reduce the frequency of infections somewhat.

In situ

Ah, and let us not forget the left hip. Good for maybe 20 feet, it then requires 20 minutes of full length flat outness to recover. I've not worked up the chutzpah to assume the position in Trader Joe's or at the glasses buying place, but I'm confident I'll get there. I'm caring less & less about what people think. It's the cat calls that annoy though. A few poundings with the Ekrin Kestrel actually help.

I asked Debbie about when folks decide to take the MAID. She said when they get tired of dealing with it all: Remembering to change the fentanyl patch, remembering to take the murilax to counteract the constipation caused by the fentanyl; remembering to take all the other meds that keep the blood pressure down, the warts off my nose and enable me to pee. 

I still think back to Justin Gorton, John & Julia's son. That guy set the bar for wanting to live. And he enjoyed eating so you know he was in his right mind. No dieting B.S. for him! I have a long way to go to match Justin's determination, but he left a pretty clear trail.

In betweeN I think about restoring Phoebe's interior. We have all the parts. I found a supplier in L.A. who's even affordable. I just need the energy to hobble out to the carport.

Thrasher

A distant cousin of the nightingale, they nest in cholla cactus. For the past few years they've shared it with roadrunners. Michelle puts out meal worms for them and there's a bowl of water. 

If she forgets, one or the other will come up to the large living-room window and peer in. There will be skirmishes and clamorings...to draw attention to the oversight.

The thrashers often sing in the mornings and evenings. Their song is more varied than a mockingbird. The mealworms are $100.00 a bag. We've never begrudged them.

Pyrotechnic Arrows

We read childrens' stories to each other before going to bed each night. Ben illustrated one of them. I went to his Youtube channel to see more of his work but he had a Patreon paywall so I just left. Apparently, he got my email as this showed up today. It's perfect for your inner 10-year-old.

Huslia Potlatch & Raven's Witness

I just finished reading Hank Lentfer's memoir of Richard K. Nelson titled Raven's Witness. 

Richard lived for a while in Huslia, a town in Alaska. And lo & behold, here came a video from Angela Gonzalez about their recent potlatch. How's that for cosmic!

Huslia Potlatch Giveaway

Population 291

Richard Nelson was a Michigan lad who loved being outside. Through a series of happenings facilitated by a college professor, he was able to be outside a lot! 

Hank Lentfer, a close friend of Richard, brings him to life in a way rarely seen on the written page. Richard died in 2019 of cancer at age 78.

The link below is to Raven's Witness on Amazon

https://www.amazon.com/Ravens-Witness-Alaska-Richard-Nelson/dp/1680513079/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?crid=2ZE37IG26KEUH&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.b8W0cFvf1kheCoMr8zQMQ4jGr_UbqmVjm6ZrZEPr18hHwMIPEYiIQUwGkifkq4autB6jmO6SvrUY4bmCS4lAuFKMfnGQBGxwF73R9mcXtuGVtzewFoEgNajrUIOgmBFsn6B1eEJqnBLuwI_0mB5Wj_KGBNB18myRkFU4PLJ8P2sv2pLBdrXoywPfrWlCaLl-a78OgTvmmLBIfTx0sg5UMA.f2L9mIKFk9im1KmUM5n6BpLQ2wfHlv6tvaZtYsThg8s&dib_tag=se&keywords=raven%27s+witness&qid=1754959014&sprefix=raven%27s+wit%2Caps%2C244&sr=8-1

Al Christensen Slipped Away

 

Here's the URL for Al's blog

https://rollingsteeltent.blogspot.com/2025/07/i-talk-to-trees-but-they-dont-listen-to.html?m=1

If you goto the bottom and click on VIEW WEB VERSION (under the blue bar that says HOME), you'll see the list of his other entries on the right.